SELL YOUR VOTE
There's a lot of money slushing around during election time. Corporations buy politicians through campaign contributions, and they in turn attempt to buy us through cheesy advertising campaigns. Money gets spent on lawn signs, confetti, balloon drops, brass bands, and streamers. Millions of dollars will be spent trying to convince us to support one candidate or another, yet none of it will end up in our wallets. All this wasted economic potential makes us patriotic Canadians cringe.
Well now, thanks to the wonders of the internet, politicians and corporations need not be the only ones to profit from electoral politics. You too can make a bit of cash, by selling your vote! Heck, everyone can fully participate in the fundraising orgy that is an integral part of our shallow democracy.
Announcing the Ballot Auction House - a program linking up voters, and vote buyers, bringing capitalism and electoral politics closer together. By selling your vote, you may not get rich, but you may be able to afford that Disney vacation you've always wanted. No longer will you have to choose between your prescription drugs, and a new pair of Nikes. No longer will you have to flip burgers at McDonalds to afford tuition.
What's more, individuals can place bids, and put their vote up for sale, in a manner which is perfectly legal. This is partly due to a series of court rulings, which state that spending money to influence elections is equivalent to free speech. So exercise your freedom of speech, and buy votes! What's more, donating money to a political party in the hopes of getting something in return is not only legal, it's tax deductible!
Of course, people are not actually buying votes. Rather, they are making "donations" to individuals who just happen to be voting for the candidate they support. And no one is selling their vote. Instead, they will accept "donations" while divulging their intention to vote for a particular candidate.
Bidding has closed. Check out:
|For more information, email ebs_at_tao.ca|